“The Talk”

I really do have a positive theology of sex. Our bodies are beautifully and wonderfully made. God designed us to enjoy sex within the context of loving, committed relationships.

My theology on sex is fine. It’s just that I don’t actually like to talk about it. Which is a little odd since my parents were the facilitators of the sex ed workshop I went to when I was a teenager. Then again, maybe that’s the reason I don’t like to talk about it.

I have two kids in Jr. High this year, and I have checked in with them periodically about what they had learned in school. I’ve addressed a few specific issues. But we never really had “the talk.”

So I took the opportunity recently to check in with my son. “You know, honey, you’re a teenager now and your body is changing. I just wondered if you had any questions for me about sex or anything.”

“No, Mom. I’m just too young to have sex yet. That’s what I told Sam.”

Sam is a friend from church who had been over at our house the day before. And Sam is four years younger than my son. (In the adult world, four years is nothing. In the pre-teen/teen world, it’s an eternity.)

“You told Sam what? I thought you guys were just playing Legos.”

“I told him that he’s too young to have sex.”

“Did he ask you about sex?”

“No, I just told him that. Because we are. Too young.”

“I know, but . . . did you tell him anything else about sex?”

“No, that was pretty much it.”

“In the future, I don’t think you really need to talk about sex with Sam at all. His parents can answer any questions he has. And if you have any questions, you need to ask me or your dad.”

“O.K., Mom.”

And that was it. The extent of my sex ed talk with my son. After which I had to contact Sam’s parents. Who had not had “the talk” with their son yet. And were, I think, hoping to put it off for a while longer.

They seemed more amused than upset by the incident. I just hope they still feel like the pastor’s house is a good place to send their kid on a Sunday afternoon.

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